Madame De Parkerdour, or 'Valoch' as she is now known, has been forbidden from (I quote her) "touching" me in physics lessons, much to our mutual disappointment. I have thus resorted to writing the negative form of yes on her hand as a sign of my despised restraints.
The rustic iron chains have been cast down informally by a person of great knowledge and power, a person whom is originally from Scotland and would like to tell us things of which there is no time. This person is a warlock, she controls the structure of atoms with her red, green and yellow pieces of card. She despairs at the inappropriate and forcéd hugs that I have so valiantly endured.
Valoch hides behind a shield of mascara and eye-liner, with dyed hair and brown eyes, prodding me with her vicious spears and accusations of a sullen countenance - which simply are not true! I fight back with my only tools: pens and 'borrowed' stationary, of which there is little. Supplies are running low after the fifth night of raids and help must be sent soon! I implore ye watchers of this discord, send forth the bus!